How to Co-Parent Amicably After Separation
January 10, 2023Co-parenting after separation or divorce is a difficult task, and it’s made even harder when parents have not yet reached an agreement on custody, support, and other issues. Here are some tips for making your co-parenting relationship work:
Table of Contents
Involve Your Lawyer In A Settlement Negotiation
A lawyer can be an invaluable asset in your divorce. A good separation lawyer in Northern Beaches from Gentles Family Lawyers can help you prepare for the negotiations, mediation and court appearances that will take place during this stressful time.
Your lawyer should act as a mediator between you and your partner to ensure that all decisions about child custody, visitation rights and child support are fair for both parties.
If one parent does not have a lawyer or cannot afford one, that parent may be at a disadvantage when negotiating with their spouse who has hired legal counsel. If this is the case, consider volunteering to pay for their attorney fees until they find employment or obtain public benefits such as unemployment insurance or welfare payments.
Take a Break.
If you are planning to co-parent amicably after separation, then the first thing you should do is take a break from the situation. You can’t make decisions rationally if everything is still fresh in your mind and in your heart.
It’s also important not to think too much about what happened during this time. You need time away from analyzing every detail of your relationship until you’ve had some distance from it. Don’t talk about it with friends or read blogs or articles about separation because these things will only keep reminding you of your feelings and thoughts surrounding the separation. It’s healthy for children if their parents aren’t talking about their break-up all the time—especially when those conversations are negative in nature!
Maintain Continuity for Your Children
According to MT Wellington daycare, in order to maintain consistency for your child, you should make sure that he or she has a routine. This means that the child does not have to adjust to new rules and routines every time he or she visits one parent or the other.
Children of divorced parents may also have trouble sleeping. If this is the case for your child, it is recommended that you set up a consistent bedtime routine so that they can fall asleep easily and quickly at night. In addition, make sure their homework time is consistent with both parents’ schedules so there are no surprises when it comes time to do homework. Finally, make sure there are regular playtimes during which they can bond with both parents on an equal basis without having an adult favour one parent over another (or vice versa).
Don’t Speak Negative Things About your Child’s Other Parent.
When it comes to your children’s other parents, don’t badmouth them. Your kids may not remember how you felt about their other parents when they were young, but as they get older, they’ll start developing their own opinions on the subject. Avoid saying anything negative about them in front of your children and only speak negatively about them if absolutely necessary (for example: if your ex is abusing the child). If possible, try to avoid criticizing your ex altogether; if you do have something negative to say about him or her, keep it private. Finally, don’t use your children as a weapon against their other parents. This behaviour can quickly become abusive and should never be endorsed by anyone with custody over minor children.
Allow Your Children to Express Their Feelings.
It is important to allow your children the space to express their feelings. They may be angry, upset and frustrated or feel sad, guilty or worried. Children are more likely than adults to feel intense grief following separation as they have not yet developed an understanding of permanency. Some children may not want to talk about it at all initially but over time many will find ways of expressing themselves through drawing pictures, writing stories or playing games where they can share their experience with friends.
It is important that you listen carefully when your child talks about what happened during and after the separation process. It is also important for you to remind them that no matter how difficult things have been, there will come a time when everything feels normal again – this can help reassure them that whatever happens in life things do get better again!
Prioritise Your Kids’ Education
You and your ex should agree on a schedule for your kids that allows them to participate in as many extracurricular activities as possible. You should also make sure that they never miss school, or any important milestones, if at all possible. If you can’t do this in person, hire a private tutor in Newcastle (or home-school) so that your child can continue their education without disruption.
Conclusion
When you’re co-parenting after separation, it’s important to remember that your children come first. Everything else is secondary. If you have a negative attitude towards the other parent or their parenting style, then you are doing your children a disservice by not communicating well with them about their needs and feelings.